


The Utterly Stagnant Void of My Reality. (Limbo)

by Aiyaki



Category: Naruto
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Dimension Travel, Family Issues, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, M/M, Multi, Not Canon Compliant, Original Character(s), Other, POV Original Character, Protective Siblings, Self-Insert, Trust Issues, Uzumaki Siblings, Uzushiogakure | Hidden Eddy Village
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-05-10
Updated: 2019-05-17
Packaged: 2020-02-29 17:16:46
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 3
Words: 15,085
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18782653
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Aiyaki/pseuds/Aiyaki
Summary: You'd think there would be more way's to say the word fuck. Fuck. Fuck my life. Fucking hell. Fuck you. Just. Fuck. I can't stand it. This reality. It hurts. Everything hurts. How can this even be possible how can I be stuck in this place.When you find out your world is gone, you don't remember shit. You have glimpses of past you can't remember, a sibling to to take care of, another child who is destined to save the world if the demon inside his stomach doesn't kill us all first and a village who's roots are more dripped in poison than the Hokage wants to admit.I'm going to die here. I know I am. I just hope I live long enough to save my sister in time to get the fuck out.Please. Someone. Anyone. Save me.---A story of a girl who doesn't remember who she was, used to be, where she came from, or even what world she used to live in. All she knows is three things. One. Hana is her sister. Two. She remembers the fact that the world she is now in is fictional. Three. She might not be who she thought she was.Someone. Save her.





	1. Chapter 1

 

_“Maybe I won’t find you. White ribbon tied around your arms. But you don’t leave anything left to chance. With your bloody hands. Slipping through the curfew. Throw your back out with the weight. You, couldn’t. Sit back, feet up, wait. Leave unopened doors. Sun repeat your cycle. The morning brings relief to some. Stop your voice. Disappearing so fast. Never touch the ground. The city but a shadow. The birds have come to build their roost. You could light me a fat cigar. And I’ll probably choke”_

_Terrible Stone-White Ribbon_

 

* * *

 

She was holding her sister when they both died. She forgot everything but the smell of ash coating her sister’s hair. She was so very little.

Too little to be leaving this earth with her so soon. When they both saw a bright light it was unexpected.

She floated for what seemed like forever. She knew they had died. The drunk driver came right up to the sidewalk and tailgated them.

She barely had time to grab Hana before the fire erupted around them.

What did they do? Why did they deserve this? It was her birthday. She just turned...?

Huh? Why couldn't she remember? Why was she here again?

Who, was next to her? Is it someone precious? Hana? Who's Hana? No. Hana was precious? Hana was family? Hana is her sister. Right? The question was if Hana was her sister, then who was she?

Who was she?

* * *

 

Dying didn't hurt much. The fact that my sister Hana died as well did. The emotion was uncontainable, tears spilled over my face.

How did I have a face in this black void? I blinked; was I alive? Didn’t I just die? How was I alive? This isn’t real. I must be dreaming. _Maybe I was_. I thought as I pulled my pudgy, small hand up to wipe my face.

Everything _hurt_. I tried to stand up, but my legs did not want to work with me. I fell down. Skinning my hands and knees. The sting waking up previous hurts I had been unaware off up to this point. My back was _killing_ me. _What the hell_. Trying to orient myself I looked around the area. This room was small. It was dark, and the air heavily pressed down on me like a wet blanket. _I can’t handle this. Where was I?_

“H-Hello?” I coughed.  My voice sounded scratchy and felt like sandpaper. I felt like I swallowed a lump of dust right down to my lungs. Soon I was coughing so hard that I couldn’t breathe. I couldn't breathe. Where’s my inhaler? I desperately patted my body. I started to look around the floor. Pawing at the dirt.

The crevasse like room, I couldn't breathe in it. _I need to calm down. Fuck. Shit. How do you breathe again?_ I hacked and wheezed. The dust in this place wasn’t helping. I gave up my search. _I need to calm down._ In and out. I need a paper bag. I don’t see one. _Fuck. Fuck. I don’t want to die again!_

_I don’t want to die._

_Please, I can’t breathe._

I grabbed my shirt desperately. Pushing it up my mouth. I wheezed into it. Using it as a filter. In and out. Fucking asthma. _Fuck. Fuck._

_Please. Please. Just let me breathe._

My ears were ringing loudly from my own heartbeat. I shook my head, and slowly let my shirt down. I still felt desperate for air. In this place, the air felt too thin. I needed to leave. _Fuck. How did I get here? Where was I?_

I observed the hole I was in. The wall to my right was slanted over my head. It kept the rock above me from falling. _Fuck. I really needed to get out of here. I was this close to dying again._ The wall gave a creak. _I really needed to fucking move._ In front of me, the rocks and pieces of wood caved in on each other. There was a hole. A small one. I could move it. _Maybe? Fuck. I really hope this whole place doesn’t come down on my fucking head._

Crawling over to it because I doubt, I could stand at this point. I reached the wood. The hole was dark. The wood was splintered and sharp. It looked like the pressure was going to rip it apart anyway. _Fuck._ This hole wasn’t going to last much longer.

_I need to fucking move._

I took a deep breath of the thin dusty air. I can do this.

_I don’t want to die. I can do this._

I grabbed a piece of the bottom of my shirt and started to rip it in half. Once I had a good chunk of dirt covered pink material, I wrapped it around the splintered beam.

 _Alright. I can do this. I can’t cry. I can’t. I don’t want to die._ My internal monologuing repeated as I started to pull. The beam creaked. I gave a yelp and whimpered. _Shit!_  This was terrifying. _Fuck. I don’t want to die. Fuck._

I pulled harder grabbing on to the beam making sure to keep the fabric between us. The walls shifted. S _hit! Oh my God. Fuck!_

They caved in closer. I pulled harder. The beam splintered down the middle. I could see more into the hole. I was going to jump. Oh god. I was going to need to jump.

The walls shifted again. _Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!_

The creaking and groaning of the makeshift cave created a sound like something out of a horror video game. But it was real. _I was going to die again! Fuck!_ I needed to jump. I shifted my knees. _I don’t want to die!_

Readying myself. I pulled one last time. The wood gave.

I jumped using my hands to push myself forward screaming. The room behind crashed. I covered my head. Dust rushed into the whole.

Ground zero had fallen.

* * *

 

 

Crying. I was crying. My ears where ringing and I couldn’t hear. I shook my head wincing. Something scratched my back. It fuckin hurt. I didn’t know if I was bleeding or not. My hands where. Covered in scratches and splinters.

 _Fuck._ I needed to get out of this hole.

I coughed. There was only one way to go. The path behind me was blocked by rock and wood. I went forward.

Soon my ears adjusted. And I could hear it.

I could hear a crying sound.

I crawled towards it, for some reason it seemed familiar, but I just couldn't place where I heard such a sound. Why did that noise that wine sound familiar?

I kept crawling. Soon I found myself at another dead end. _Fuck._ I was stuck again. I found the crying sound though. It was coming from the wall in front of me.

This wall seemed much sturdier. Less likely to fall on top of my head.

I’ve heard this sound before. I know I have. But where? I mused over it, gnawing my bottom lip I placed my hand on the wall. The loud wailing didn't stop. Banding in my already disoriented brain. _God that didn't help! Fuck._

"SHUT UP!" I yelled at it finally getting pissed off, the stupid wailing was giving me a headache. And I needed to think. I needed to find a way through this wall. I knew I need to get out of here. Fucking stop!

The wailing paused, I hoped for half a second it would stop altogether. Then it resumed in its screeching full force jarring my senses sharply.

 _This stupid Baby why won't you just shut up!_ I thought aggravated at the child on the other side of the wall. _Wait... That’s what the wail is. It’s a baby crying. Why didn't I know that?!_

There was a baby on the other side of this wall! Where were its parents? Why was it in this hole with me? Is it hurt?!

 _I had to get it out!_ It would surely suffocate with what little air was left in our whole. I banged at the wall, clawing it, ripping away the plaster and paint as much as I could.

I flinched as one of the clawed parts ripped open my already pealed skin. _Fuck._ I can’t get to them this way. _Fuck it hurts_.

"Waaaaahhhhh!" The baby screamed.

_Oh, fuck this._

I turned around and laid on my back. It felt like a fire that erupted into my veins, but I didn’t care. I needed to get to this child. I kicked the wall. I kept kicking it. Using my arms as a brace on the sides on the hole I kicked and kicked until the plaster gave way.

My leg was shredded.

_Fuck. Fuck it hurts._

I pulled my leg back out and crawled back to the wall. Pulling off the plaster until I had enough room to shimmy my way through.

The next room was so much bigger.

It looked wrecked. Overturned tables, a wall on one side held up by a couch. Broken lampshade on the floor. Carpet covered in glass. An entryway blocked by a mountain of dirt.

_Fuck._

A Fucking landslide. It couldn’t be anything else. Somehow A fucking landslide. _Fuck._

The baby gave another cry. I looked around the dim room but couldn’t see them. Fuck where are they?

"Hang on I'm coming baby just hang on!" I yelled searching around the room.

"Baby? Where Are you?" I asked searching for it. My eyes passed over an upturned bookshelf as I tried to find the root of the crying.

The crying got louder the closer I got to the bookshelf.  The baby must be under it. I dropped to my knees and tried to lift it to no avail.

I pushed and pulled, as the baby cried harder and harder. "I'm sorry I'm trying to get you out please just hold on a little longer." I tried to reassure the child.

 _Come on, I have to get them out! Move you stupid shelf! Let them out! God Dammit!_ Something built up in me. It rushed as I tried to lift and pull the shelf up.

It pulsed and surged to my hands. I had to get this baby out now! This strange feeling roared to life so high, so hot it was like adrenaline running through my veins. MOVE DAMMIT!

The bookshelf suddenly shattered to pieces. I jumped forward and shielded the little red-haired bundle. Do not be hurt. Please. Please do not be hurt.

_Hana._

The broken pieces fell around me hitting my exposed back. _Fuck. It hurt. It hurt._

 _Something was stuck. Defiantly stuck in there. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck._ I can’t stop crying. The tears hit Hana’s red cheeks.

This was my sister _. Oh, my fucking god. This was my sister! My sister! Hana!_ Little Hana, I cried harder. Thank god she's alive. She was filthy and covered in dirt, her little red cheeks drowning in tears. But she was alive. Thank fucking God.

I kissed her red fuzz head. _My Hana. My sister._ I held her. _I can’t believe I forgot. For one second, I forgot her. Oh God. I’m the worst._

She was heavier than I remember. Her green eyes blinking at me brightly. Her baby hand smacking me in the face as if she was saying "Took you long enough idiot."

Even as a baby she was glaring at me and I laughed.

_Thank fucking god. She was okay._

"Sorry, I'm late."

She rolled her eyes, as they drooped, and she yawned. She must be tired, I was tired too, all that energy of getting to her wiped me out.

I carried her heavy body to a sturdy looking side of the hole. It had an upturned table that I hid us under. It was big enough for both of us lay down in. I didn't feel like making another attempt at another wall to get us out. I just wanted to fucking sleep for a week.

"We'll just rest here for a little bit, then I'll get us out okay," I said to as I set her on my chest. I wasn’t going to let her go again. Hana was already on her way to sleep. I was close behind her.

I'll get us out soon Hana, I thought before I faded into darkness.

* * *

 

Sunlight woke me up. I curled instinctively around my sister shielding her from it. I felt it glaring on my face making me open my eyes.

The roof of our little whole had been ripped off. I blinked. _What the hell?_

There was a weirdly dressed guy panting heavily above me. He was wearing a white painted mask that looked similar to a fox.

He motioned to someone behind him. Another person dressed similar to him showed up as well. I glared at them. Pulled Hana closer and shuffled more under our table.

“Daijoo desuka?" The man asked trying to reach us. I flinched away from him. I didn't know him. _What the fuck did he say?_

He backed up, the other guy with a dog mask on, moving towards us. “De te ki te ku re ana tano kinko.”He bent towards us again and lifted his mask. Brown eyes and brown hair greeted me.

He smiles sadly and motioned me to come to him. “Sou yo daijoo da.” He said moving his hand forward as if he was waiting for a wild animal.

I didn't know what he was saying. I didn’t know him. _Fuck._ I know I needed to get out of this hole but the people were not American’s. They could be terrorists for all I know. They could have caused this. Fucking hell. I didn’t want to go with them to the Red Cross got here.

But I didn't really want me and Hana to stay in this hole either. _Fuck. This is a bad idea. Fuck._ Looking around. I weighed my options. _Okay. First. Get out of the fucking whole. Then. Find out some information. If the guy turns out to be a terrorist. Kick him in the balls and steal his gun. Then run like fucking hell. Find a U. S. more solid and get home. Alright. Plan created. Time to get out of this fucking whole._ Tentatively I reached out my bloodied hand to his. His gripped mine firmly and pulls us out of the whole.

Bright light flooded my vision and shielded my eyes. The first thing I saw when we got out of the whole was a wasteland. _Fuck._ I clung tighter to Hana. What the fuck happened. What the fuck did these terrorists do? I thought to look at the weirdly dressed men.

All around us, there was collapsed buildings and trees. It looked like God had taken a hammer and smashed the town around us.

_The Hell happened here?_

I didn't have time to ask the guy as he picks me up unexpectedly. "Hay!" I said surprised my voice came out so squeaky. I held Hana tighter as the two men sprinted off in some direction. _Fucking. Kidnapped. Fucking hell. Oh, my fucking God. Shit. Shit. Okay. New plan. Don’t drop Hana and when he stops run like hell. Fuck!_

The world blurred around us; the guy's jumping higher than I thought humanly possible. To fucking fast. Was this guy on fucking steroids for speed. Shit.

Hana woke up and started to cry, the guy looked down at us in his arms and said something I assume along the lines of we're almost there, _Or I’m going to kill you but I'm not completely sure I don't speak gibberish_. And I was fucking terrified.

I curled as best I could around Hana in his arms, the fast pace causing something on his neck to whack me on the head. I turned sharply and glared at it.

It was some sort of metal thing with a familiar symbol on it. It’s kind of looked like the Leaf village symbol but It was hard to tell with the guy jerking us around so much. That's just great we've been kidnapped by a bunch of Naruto cosplayer terrorist. _Oh, my fucking god. The Japanese invaded. Fucking hell._

_Great._

The two men rushed us to a white building what I assumed was a hospital. It was bustling and crowded with similarly dressed people all with headbands and all covered in blood.

My eyes widened, _why were so many people...?_ The guy grabbed a lady that was passing by and handed me and Hana to her then left us. W _hat was that guy's problem!_ _The hell man, you kidnap us and just leave us with other strangers? Okay, Fuck. I can’t deal there are too many people around me. One guy, I can deal with. All these people. Fuck. Where are the American’s? Fucking hell. How did I end up here? I’m starting to think this wasn’t a terrorist attack. At least…not one on U. S. soil. Fuck._

_Where am I?_

I tried to get out of the brown-haired woman's grip struggling with her to get down, I was going to get out of here. I needed to find the American or British Embassy. _Fuck. I needed to get me and Hana home._

The woman screeched something in gibberish as she touched my bloodied back. OWWWW!

I turned to her eyes watering. She rushed us to a room setting us on the bed with another nurse lady following her. _No. Fuck, let go of me._

_God dammit._

She spoke more gibberish as another lady tried to take Hana from me. _Oh, hell no!_

I screamed and growled at them. _How dare they try to take my sister from me!_

I put up a fight and even bit one of the nurse’s hands when they were finally able to separate us. It took three nurses to hold me down so one of them could heal my back. I scratched and clawed all the way even as the pain in my back dulled. This was insane. Fucking insane. I want to go home.

I screamed for them to give Hana back. They ignored me. I could see another nurse with glowing green hands hovering over my sister. What the fuck was that. This alien shits. The fuck was going on.  Whatever they were doing to her made her stop crying. I needed to get to her though. I can’t stand it. I was useless. _What did they do to her?_

When the nurses were done doing whatever they were doing to me they gave me back Hana. _Oh god._

I grasped her, crying, why were these people so much stronger than me. What the fuck.

This was the first time in my life that I felt so helpless. W _here the hell were we?_

* * *

 

 

Three Weeks Later-

We were in a village. An undated low technological village. That has people who speak Japanese, who’s hands glow, who dress weird, who had strange hair colors, who just had a terrorist attack and who had no concern or care for the world's privacy or personal bubble.

They called it the Kōhai, a devastating attack by some monster or group of people that wipe out half the village. Destroyed their support system and knocked out half their power. The lights and the hospital still go out from time to time.

There was a lot of dead. A lot of injured. And a lot of orphans. Hana and I where two of them. The first week we were isolated. My lungs were messed up. I had to go through treatment after treatment until I could finally breathe normally again. From what I could understand I had breathed in a toxin or miasma gas that had been leaking from the house I had been crushed under. Hana was the same. She wasn’t as bad though. I guess because she was locked under the bookshelf and it blocked off some of the gas and locked her in an air bubble. My back was scarred. I had a huge piece of wood splintered into from trying to get Hana out or from almost getting crush in the room I woke up in. I don’t know which. My leg was broken. My muscle cut into ribbons. They could heal that. They could heal parts of the break too. But I was still in a cast. And it fucking sucked. At least I didn’t lose my leg. I’ve seen a lot of men, women, and even some children who’ve had to leave the hospital without a limb. This world was so fucking weird. My hands were healed too. The nurses who took care of me originally; two of them from what I understand, didn’t want to heal them. They just wanted to rap them in bandages and go to the next patient. But the one I bit.

Her name was Hekima, she healed them. I don’t know why. She just smiled at me and healed them. I kind of felt bad for biting her. The next week Hana and I were moved to a room with children. I didn’t understand at first. I wasn’t a child. I was older. Maybe they thought I was a child because I was suddenly shorter? I didn’t realize till I looked into a window pane on the way to the room.

Blonde hair and blue eyes reflected back at me. My hair was long. So much longer than I was used to. It went down to my knees. _How could I not notice this?_ _Fuck._ I haven’t been noticing a lot lately.

This needs to stop. I was a child. I looked like a fucking child. No older than three or four. Hell. I could possibly be even two if I didn’t have a higher intelligent gaze in my eyes. _Oh, my fucking god. How did this happen?_

_Fuck. I really did fuckin die. Didn’t I?_

The room with the other children was load. Sometimes they were crying. Sometimes playing. Sometimes others were trying to comfort each other. It was just sad. And it hurt. Fuck. I was one of them. Hana was one of them. Each and every one of these kids. We were all orphans.

Keeping myself under control was hard. I woke up with nightmares. Flashes of red and blond hair. Smiles and giggles and then crying. Screaming. Blood. I couldn’t sleep at all. I wet myself the second night with the orphans. It was horrifying. Hekima had heard me trying to change the sheets and ended up comforting me. God, it was embarrassing. She seemed to try to take me under her wing. I don’t fucking know why.

The next day she started trying to teach me to speak. I hadn’t said a word to them the whole time I had been there. And now she was trying to get me to talk. Fuck. She asked me my name.  Morning. Noon. And night.

The next day too. And the Next day. She brought a children’s book with words on how to sound out vowels and constantans. She started speaking in slow small sentences as if she was trying to get me to repeat her.

I fuckin didn’t get her deal. I just didn’t. I just wanted for her to leave Hana and me alone. She’d help me feed Hana. Ask me things. Point to Hana like she was asking things about her. I didn’t understand her though. I was so freaking done.

Finally, Hekima seemed to find my silence enough to get it into her head that she could do what she wanted. So, she came up to me by the fourth day of the second week and pointed to me at breakfast.

“Ai!” She said and then hummed saying something else. Her two braids of brown hair at the side of head swung as her shoulders scrunched up when she brought her hand up to her chin in a thinking pose.

Hekimi’s brown eyes lit up suddenly. “Ya! Ai-Ya! Ana tano namae ha Aiya desu! O na tomi shii shiruku na kami ni! Kaminoke you na utsukushii shiruku desu!”

 I stared at her. Did this bitch just name me like a fucking dog? “No!” I yelled at her throwing my chopsticks at her face. Hekimi caught them as her face lit up like a freaking Christmas tree on the Fourth of July. Oh. Fuck.  

“Dakara hanasu koto ga de ki ru!” She yelled in excitement and started the babble on making gestures with her hands. I fucking screwed myself. She looked so fucking happy. God dammit.

She started to point to me and her.  “Hekimi!” She said and then gestured to me. Ah fuck. I didn’t know what to do. I didn’t remember my fucking name. Not that it mattered. I knew Hana’s so that’s all that mattered. I didn’t need one. If I could just get home. They could look up my identity and find me in the system Right? Fuck.  I looked at her eager face waiting patiently for me to reply. I was a fucking kid now. Could anyone even tell who I was anymore? Did I even look the same as I did before? I couldn’t remember so I didn’t know.  Fuck. Hekimi was still waiting. I sighed. Slowly I brought my hand up to my heart and pointed to my own self. If I didn’t have a name, I guess the one she gave me wasn’t so bad. I at least new Ai in Japanese and Chinese meant love, right? So, it couldn’t be all bad.  “Aiya,” I said grumbled.  Hekimi grinned so wide she looked like she was going to blow up the sun. God fucking Dammit. 

She squealed. Literally squealed. Oh, my fucking god and pointed to Hana in the crib next to my bed who was dozing. “Ana tano kyodai no namae ha kade suka?”

I sighed again. Giving her an angry look. “Hana.”  She smiled clutching her hands to her chest. “Hana.” She repeated looking at my sister. Then she looked back at me. “Aiya.”

“Hajime mashi te. Aiya-chan, Hana-Chan.” Hekimi said and then bowed. I blushed. The fuck. I know she just said something about meeting us. I knew hajime mashi is like nice to meet your something. But she like didn’t need to fucking bow. God damn. This woman is nuts. I wish she would just leave us alone.

She sat back up soon enough, wiping at her eyes. Soon she was bringing out that dreaded book again and trying to teach me fucking vowels. God Dammit woman! Just leave me alone already! 

* * *

 

The third week found Hana and me in a whole new predicament. People. Fucking people had invaded. Our ward had a steady stream of people coming in and out sometimes it was the nurses like usual. But other times. It was adults. People we didn’t know.

They would take the other orphans. Come over and sit down and talk to some. Sometimes they didn’t leave with them. But most of the times they did. Some looked very happy. Some looked like family reunited others looked morose to be leaving. Like they were walking to their own funeral. I felt bad for those kids.  People tried to come up to Hana and me as well. I glared at them so severely that sometimes that was enough to get to the back the fuck off. Others who looked at Hana hopefully who didn’t look afraid of me. I had to speak the words. Hekimi didn’t like that. She also looked affronted at me as to where I learned that. I didn’t tell it was Kyoko from the night shift.

That nurse is a woman after my own heart. She had, had a certain encounter with another male medical nurse and screamed those words at him.  When I yelled the same words at the potential parents that tried to come over to Hana and me, they got this green like look on their faces and soon left.  It was the funniest shit I have ever seen. Hekimi didn’t find it funny. I ignored her scolding and just fed Hana. I don’t know why it matters. Hekimi is the only one I semi-trust in this place anyway. If she wanted us to leave, she should just take us home.   _Not like I would go with anyone else._  As soon as I thought those words the doors to the ward opened up and a stream of people walked in.

The weirdly dressed people where back. The ones with the weird metal armbands and white masks. They were walking beside this old man with a giant straw hat with a white flap and some black kanji, he had white and red robes on and a black outfit underneath. He was really old. Had liver spots on his hands and face and looked like he hadn’t slept in twenty years. His gray hair peeked out under his hat and he looked over the room with a wary gaze.  

Hekimi and Saioko the other nurse on duty went over to him and bowed. The spoke in a low enough tone that I couldn’t hear what was said but I didn’t need to. The robed old man started to walk to each left-over orphan’s bed and speak with them quietly. He’d make sure to look over their charts, then if he decided something one of his masked men would take the child after they packed up their things.  I watched all this happen as he slowly made his way around the room. Some he left in the beds. But where did the orphans go with the masked men? Where did he have them take them? If he thinks he can separate Hana and me, this man has another thing coming I’ll gut him with the scalpel I stole from Kyoko’s pocket the other day. Fuck what Hekimi thinks.  He was at my bedside before I knew it.

I had already picked up Hana and kept her in my arms. I wasn’t giving up my sister without a fight. Let him try. I palmed the scalpel in my pocket as I glared at him.  Hekimi came over and stood beside me placing her arm over my shoulder as if she knew I was ready to start something.  The big hat guy sat down at in the visitor’s chair beside my bed picking up my chart and flipping through it.  Sighing the man rubbing his neck causing a few pops before he leveled his gaze with mine. He gave me a kind smile at my glare. “Hello, Aiya-chan. I’m Sarutobi Hiruzen the Third Hokage, how are you today?” He asked speaking slowly and plainly. 

My chart must have said I wasn’t good with the language. “Fine,” I replied. I wish I knew how to say what the fuck do you want.  “Good. That’s good.” He replied folding my chart and placing it in his lap. “It’s been a few weeks since the attack, are you and your sister holding up okay?” He asked still keeping his words slow. “Yes,” I replied holding Hana closer.  He smiled and gave a nod. “That’s good. You got your cast of yesterday; you must be happy to be able to walk on two feet again.” He commented. I shrugged. What the fucked was he getting at. Small talk was annoying. Ugg. Can he just go away already? He must have seen I was getting aggravated because his next question took me off guard. “Aiya-chan do you know how you ended up so close to the attack?” I scrunched up my face.

I was what now? I looked over at Hekimi. She looked down at me and nodded. I didn’t fuckin know.  I just woke up in the freaking dark with Hana and I don’t remember. And I don’t know enough words to explain that. Shit. “No. D...Don’t…No..” I said stuttering. I couldn’t remember the words. Hekimi nodded and said something to The Big Hat Guy. The old man nodded and turned back to me. “Do you remember how old you are?” He asked giving me a sad look.  Fuck. Hekimi looked at me like that too. They both had those sad eyes. Fuck. Don’t look at me like that. I don’t remember. Fuck you. I don’t remember but don’t fucking look at me like that.  

I glared at both of them. “No,” I growled.  Hekimi’s grip on my shoulder almost became painful as she looked from me to the robed old man. He gave me a sad look, sighing wearily and rubbed his eyes.“Thank you, Aiya-chan. I’m so sorry for your loss. I’ll make sure you and your sister are well taken care of alright.” He said standing up. He motioned to one of his masked men making me flinch and clutch on to Hekimi.  Fucking no, I wasn’t going with them.

The fucking possible terrorists’ cosplayers. I wasn’t fucking leaving. Hat guy saw my flinch and paused. “Don’t worry. You and little Hana-chan are not leaving just yet Aiya-chan the other children just had family outside the village they could live with. You and the rest of the children will join the orphanage at the end of the week. Everything will be alright.” He said smiling.  What. I was what now? The orphanage. What the fuck. Like hell. I looked at Hekimi in disbelief. 

She just smiled at me sadly and nodded like she knew this all along. What the fuck. No fucking way.  Before I could even protest the man was gone and it was just Hana, Hekimi and I with the rest of the orphans left again.  Oh, fucking hell no.  How was I going to get out of this? Where was I even to go? I was stuck in this place, away from anywhere and anyway back to home or anyone I knew. Like I could remember anyone. And the one person I could semi-trust didn’t want me.

 _Fuck._ I felt like crying again.  _What the hell Hekimi_.  I clutched Hana to my chest. _Adults sucked_. I couldn’t rely on anyone here but my sister and myself. _God Dammit. I just want to go home. Where ever that is._

At the end of the week, the Big Hat Guy picked us up. Hekimi said goodbye. I did not cry. I was mad at her. I did not cry. I didn’t. I wasn’t going to see her again anyway. Who cared about a bunch of orphans anyway? No one. That’s who.

We were herded out of the hospital and into the town. It was the first time since Hana, and I were taken to the hospital allowed outside.

The air was so much clearer, and bright. I could feel the grass beneath my bare feet, it was so soft. I breathe it in marveling at the greenery around me. The sun made it hot but I didn’t care. I was outside after three weeks of white walls and indoors. Even if I felt like crap this was a small silver lining.

We were taken to a Japanese style house on the far side of the village. The Big hat guy had grabbed my hand and was leading me inside it. Guess he wasn’t taking the chance of me running away. God damn you Hekimi. I knew I shouldn’t have tried to leave those first few nights of isolation.

We stopped in what seemed to be a living room. Three women were there waiting for us. One was holding a baby with spiky blonde hair the very same shade as mine. The other two women were going through scrolls one seaming to be listing off names.

When Big Hat Guy and I entered they all immediately stood up. Dude was definitely a pimp or something.

"Hokage-Sama Are these the other orphaned children from the hospital?" The one with the baby asked.

"Yes, Shion. " He then lifted my hand towards her, “This little one here is Aiya-chan and her Sister Hana-chan, the girl by Wombat is Tenten-chan, next to her is Lee-Kun."

"Wombat-san is holding two unknown twin children their names now are Sougi the girl, and Miyuki the boy. The other two children Anbu-san are holding, are the late Sora and Kaede-san's children, Kaoru and Hika, they were born a day before the accident" He finished grimacing.

The lady swallowed and smiled tightly. Even I could tell she was faking it, she actually looked like she wanted to cry or maybe rip something apart.

"I see well we will put them with the rest of the twenty-eight children then. Suki, take the children to their rooms while I talk with Hokage-sama."

"Yes, ma'am." One of the girls next to her took the baby from her arms and grabbed my hand.

I was pulled with Hana to follow her. I turned toward Big hat guy was he really just going to leave us here without a goodbye? What was wrong with all these people?

And why did they keep calling Big hat guy Hokage? That was strangely familiar as well, everything they've been saying was freaky.

The lady pulled me sharply down the hall as the baby in her arms started to cry.

"Naruto you little demon quiet, you will wake the other children!" She whispered yelled at him.

It was then I finally noticed that she was holding him weirdly.

It was like she didn't even want to touch him keeping him as far away from her body she could possibly get with one hand and glaring venomously at him.

I could tell that she disliked the baby it showed from her face the moment we stepped out of the room. She really hated him. How could a person at a baby? She dragged Hana and me with her as she walked down the hall. I held Hana closer as she shoved us roughly into another room this one with a bunch of cribs and two beds. She literally dropped Naruto on the floor and left with the rest of the children leaving me holding my sister with a horrified look on my face. I rushed to him; he was crying even harder as I tried to calm him down.

"Ssshhh, Naruto Ssh," I whispered.

Hana stared at him then started crying as well. I shhhed them both and started to hum under my breath trying to get both of them to calm down.

Naruto cried himself to sleep after what seemed like hours of crying. I was able to get Hana to fallow him soon after. I set them next to each other on the bed and covered them up. Hopefully, they’ll sleep through the night, I thought as I laid next to them.

I mused over the woman's strange behavior. I mean it was a baby. What right did she have to hate him and almost hurt him like that? That was child abuse.

She extremely disliked him.

He was just a baby why would she hate him?

Why?

Ever since I got here nothings been making sense. I'm younger, and I'm pretty sure I was older, the people are weird their hands glow green, Big hat guy seems to be the mafioso pimp around here and this lady is hating on poor little Naruto…

What did he do to her?

What could a baby do.?

Why did she? She hated him for what he was. What was he...?

I stared at him sleeping soundly next to my sister. He turned to curl around Hana protectively and wrapped his baby arm around her.

I went to pull his blanket that had fallen from his tiny shoulders up. But I stopped for some reason my conscience was telling me I had to see his stomach, there was something I was missing, I pulled the cloth down exposing his navel. There on his small little tummy surrounding his belly button was an intricate seal that made me shiver, this sign it showed, I know I have seen before.

It clicked...

Naruto, Naruto, Naruto, hated baby, child, nine tail fox jinchūriki, Kakashi, team seven, Uchiha. ...Tobi...

Everything came rushing back to me at once making me stop in my tracks. The weird clothes, the gibberish, I, Hana and I, we, we, we were in the shinobi world!

_Oh No... No... No._

* * *

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A: I’m using google don’t hate for the translates. Aiya’s name means Beautiful Silk. This story I originally wrote on Fanfiction.net Somethings happened in my life and I kind of lost inspiration for it and My family had lost our house and I lost my computer and stuff….so I’ve decided to rewrite it. I suck a grammar and stuff but I’m trying to get better so if you see anything let me know I’ll try to fix it. I hope my readers like it. I’m going to be continuing on AO3 because I feel like Fanficiton.net is dying. Thanks for support guys.
> 
> Japanese:  
> “Daijoo desuka?”  
> “De te ki te ku re ana tano kinko”  
> “Sou yo daijoo da”  
> “Ana tano namae ha Aiya desu! O na tomi shii shiruku na kami ni! Kaminoke you na utsukushii shiruku desu!”  
> “Dakara hanasu koto ga de ki ru!”  
> “Ana tano kyodai no namae ha kade suka?”  
> “Hajime mashi te. Aiya-chan, Hana-Chan.”  
> English:  
> "Are you okay?"  
> "You can come out now do not worry it is safe"  
> “That’s right It’s Okay.”  
> “Your name is Aiya!”  
> “Your name means beautiful silk because of your hair!”  
> “Your hair looks like beautiful Silk”  
> “So, you can talk!”  
> “What’s your sibling’s name?”  
> “It’s nice to meet you, Aiya-chan, Hana-chan.”


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nope. 
> 
> No. 
> 
> I can't do this. 
> 
> How many Fucks. Can I fit to describe how fucking fucked I am.
> 
> God save me.

Chapter 2

_“But wait my life's out, a night out. Brothers in town, some doubt, a few fights. Now kicked out clubs, shit the suns up. One look's all it took for his girl to cuss at another. Dudes being dudes. They blow at the chest to impress these breasts. That'd just started this mess. They must protect the damsel in distress. So other girl's man decides to clench his fists. And then he threw and missed. Brother's hit, as did his. Dropped him quick, then one kick to the head. Oh shit other man is dead” - Merk & Kremont _

* * *

 

 

 

How? Was the question I kept asking. I stood up and started pacing. How the fuck did this happen!?

Being in the Naruto universe, the horrible universe where ninja where real, children were mass produced as killing machines, and wars were created over the stupidest of shit.

Why did I have to deal with this! Why did my sister Hana, she didn't need this? Just the thought of her one day made to become a ninja, a kunoichi, where she could possibly be killed every day by a comrade, an enemy, a power-hungry tyrant. Oh, my fucking god. By Danzo. Fucking Shit. That manic just contributed to the murder of Naruto’s parents! Oh fuck. Shit. Fucking shit. I can’t deal with this. Madara AKA Obito Uchiha was literally in Konoha not even three weeks ago.

Fucking Shit-take Mushrooms! I started to pull at my hair breathing heavily. This is the worst!

God fucking dammit! I’m in fucking Konohagakure! Literally the best and worst place on earth to be in the fucking Shinobi world!

And Naruto Oh god he had it worse, so much worse, right now he literally had a living breathing demon in him. Kuruma. No, he was still the Kyuubi, was trapped inside him, rampaging and looking for a moment a weakness in the seal to get out and demolish everything in sight.

Oh, my fucking god. He is pissed off right fucking now. I looked back over at the sleeping child as if Naruto’s stomach was suddenly going to burst open Alien style and release the Kyuubi at that moment. Ah, Fuck. I can’t do this. He looks so innocent and adorable. I know better but I’m so fucking scared right now.

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.

I pulled at my hair again some strands already giving way to fall to the ground. I’m going to die from a heart attack. Just stressing over this stuff is giving me palpitations. Oh, my fucking god.

This little boy was innocent. I needed to remember that. Minato Namikaze’s seal will not break. It can’t without the key. Naruto can’t get that unless he goes to the Toads which won’t be for a very long fucking time. I took a deep breath. I needed to calm the fuck down. Gosh. Why did thinking of the fourth Hokage fucking hurt? God, He should have not died. Him and Kushina. They both should have just grabbed Naruto and run. Fucking self-sacrificing idiots. Gosh. I brushed the tears that started springing from my eyes. This is so stupid. I laughed. I’m going to insane here.

Naruto will be hated by the entire village. Forced to act out just for attention because he will be deprived of it so much. Then beaten, and beaten emotionally down, forced to become a ninja just to have a chance at a better life to protect himself from the council, from Danzo, from the villagers brave enough to try to kill a jinchūriki, from the Akatsuki, Kaguya. Holy shit, so much fucking shit. I can’t even. We’re going to die here. I’m going to die here.

Oh god, tears sprung out and down my face.

I turned to them, two children. Naruto and Hana both sleeping peacefully without the weight of the world I was feeling right now. Naruto’s arm was still curled around Hana’s small body. She had shifted in her sleep to bury her face into his tiny chest. Oh, sweet Jesus, they were so innocent. So untainted by the world around them. I looked around the room Suki had left us in. She hadn’t even come back yet to check on me or Hana. She didn’t even care enough that two children were missing now that she was away from the demon spawn did, she? Oh, my fucking god.

I put my head between my knees as I pulled at my hair. I can’t do this. I can’t. I don’t know how. I’m not ready for this. I just want to protect my sister. I just want to get home. I just want to take Hana and go.

He was just a baby. Just a child. How could I condemn him? How could I walk away from this? I cried. Jesus Christ. I’m so horrible. How could I even think for one moment of walking away? I want to run. I want to leave. I don’t want to know this.

I don’t want to know he’s here.

Why did you place me here god? Why did you put him in my path? I can’t. I don’t want to die. I want to run to the mountains. To the grass or Taki or somewhere where the war doesn’t reach and just take Hana and go. But.

I can’t look over at him. His little cheeks. His whiskers. His hair. He is so tiny. It’s not his fault. I know. I know. But. I’m scared.

I’m scared.

So, I cry.

I cried until my face was dry and rotten. Till Hana started fussing and I had to move so Naruto wouldn’t wake up. I rocked her back to sleep and changed her real quick before putting her back on the bed next to him.

Hours passed and I sat in the dark thinking about what to do. It was like that stupid song or should I stay, or should I go. It was early morning when I was jarred out of my thoughts by Naruto waking up crying. I picked him up quickly trying to shush him. I didn’t want him to wake Hana or for the matrons to hear us. If they haven’t checked on us by now, I doubt they cared. And I don't think I could deal with more than one baby crying right now.

"Ssh, Naruto it's okay I'm here, ssh," I told him rocking him back and forth. He didn't want to calm though and continued to cry. I checked his nappy to see if it was bothering him, but it was dry. Must be hungry then. I gave him one of Hana's extra bottles from our bag.

I sat us back down on the bed. He had grasped the bottle as soon as he smelt it near his lips drinking it up fast.

Had he'd been fed at all today? Or yesterday? Was the abuse already starting?

I tried to make sure he drank it slowly so he wouldn't get sick later. I did not want to have to clean up baby puke from my one and an only good t-shirt. I stared at him. His blue eyes staring brightly back at. He gurgled and reached his hand up and slapped my face. What is with little babies slapping me in the face? I glared back at him wrinkling my nose.

His eyes brighten and he then grasped my nose marveling at it and trying to see if he could pull it off. I gently pulled his hand off and let him mess with my fingers.

How can anyone hate such a little creature? I sighed. Fuck. Fuck.

I can’t. I can’t walk away from this can I? I was stuck here the moment I realized who he was. I was such a fucking sucker. I’m going to die. Anbu is going to kidnap me. Danzo will experiment on me. Going to get killed trying to be a failure as a ninja. The Hokage will probably try to kill me just for being around Naruto.

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. My fucking life.

I looked down at Naruto’s whiskered clad face as he tried to eat my fingers. Then looked over to my sleeping sister behind me.

“Whelp, kiddo. Guess you just gained two more family members.” I said sighing letting my hair curtain over us as he gurgled excitedly to me.

Yep. Definitely going to die.

I’m going to need to learn how to fight.

Fucking hell.

* * *

 

Six months it had been a solid six months since the Hokage left us in the orphanage. He didn't even come by to check up on Naruto like it was implied from the manga.

If that wasn’t neglectfulness, I don’t know what is. Isn’t he supposed to be his grandfather? Or like Naruto’s legal guardian or something? The fuck was wrong in this society. How could this man not check up on a child who is literally holding back the very demon that destroyed your village not even six months ago?

Living it’s-a-hard-not-life-Aiya’s-ville fucking sucked. Suki the third most hated matron on the planet of earth needed to die in the pits of hell and be burned at the stake at the same time. She was the fucking worst. I hated her almost as much as she learned to hate me more than she hated Naruto. And that was saying something.

She found us the next day looking for Hana and me for breakfast. She wasn’t even coming to give Naruto his bottle she only brought one for Hana. She first was short and sweet, trying to get me to come with her with Hana and come to the other room to join the other children. When I refused. She got mean. She picked up Hana and grabbed me by the ear and dragged me out.

I bit her twice. She locked me up in the closet while she took Hana to another room. I wasn’t allowed to leave until I learned what I have done wrong. I screamed and raged for the whole day.

Shion let me out at supper time. I was allowed to eat by that time my voice was cracked, and I demanded to see my sister. Shion led me to a room with the other children and there I found my sister in a bed with four other babies.

I did not cry when I picked her up and held her. I did not.

Another woman came in at bedtime to tuck everyone in. She looked similar to Shion, so I assumed they were sisters. Or at least closely related. She came over to Hana and I and tried to put Hana in with the babies. I barred my teeth at her. She must have heard from Suki that I bite because she backed up right away scowling at me. She rolled her eyes and told me not to let Hana fall off the bed.

As if I didn’t already fucking know that Bitch.

Lights out came. And I waited. Soon the children were asleep all around me. I pushed back my covers and grabbed our bags. Cradling Hana, I softly walked out of the room trying not to make any noise.

Once I was out, I looked down the dark hallway and made my way back to Naruto’s room.

Turning the corner, I got closer to his room I could softly hear whimpers coming from his room’s direction.

Fuck.

I sped up my walking until I burst through his door. There was a crib on the right side of the room like he was in a cage was Naruto crying. There was some sort of tag on the crib. I don’t know what it did but since it looked like Naruto was crying rather loudly and I could barely hear him it looked like sound muffling.

Oh, my fucking god.

Those bitches!

They could fucking kill him this way. He could get really hurt if we couldn’t hear to help him!

I ran over to him and ripped the tag right off the crib. Suddenly his cries screamed into the room and I winced.

I’m going to punch one of those bitches. Hana started crying too as the sudden noise woke her up.

I prioritized one child over the other and placed Hana in the crib next to Naruto and picked him up. The smell hit me immediately and I gagged. I’m going to fucking punch those bitches after I shove Naruto’s nappy in their face!

How long has he been sitting in this?! I riffled out one of Hana’s nappies and started to undress Naruto and clean him.

Keeping his old nappy to the side I picked him back up and placed him over to the other side of the room on one of the soft beds. Then I hurriedly ran back and picked up Hana out of the crib before going back to him.

Calming them both down took the rest of the night as I made sure he was fed, burped and was able to get to sleep. I didn’t get to sleep until early in the morning.

That was how Shion found us the next day around lunchtime.

Again, I was put in the closet. This time I had bruises on my arms. Shion had bite marks on hers.

I wasn’t released until the next day this time, I was starving. The woman who I didn’t know the name of, turned out to be named Saiua, released me.

She stared at me as I glared at her from my curled position in the closet. She tossed me a bread roll and left the door open. I watched her leave as I clutched it before I scarfed the wheat down.

Crawling out I followed her back to the kids’ room where I found my sister once again with the other babies.

She did her rounds as I picked up Hana again and laid down on our assigned bed. She didn’t even try to tuck us in this time.

She did give me look though like she knew what I was up to. It was that obvious though. And I wasn’t hiding it. I raised my eyebrow at her, and she rolled her eyes mumbling under breath about kids being stupid.

I snuck out that night too. Next day I was put in the closet for two more days.

The next time it was a week.

The time after that. Four days.

The time after that I was lashed with a switch.

Five days in the Closet no food.

After that.

I broke Suki’s hand with my bare teeth when she tried to claw Naruto from my arms.

I got separated from Hana for a month for that. I couldn’t do anything. It was like they had my weakness. I stopped going to Naruto’s room after that.

Hana was returned to me after that month. I needed to get creative now.

I can’t let them bully me. I made a promise to myself. And I wasn’t going to walk away from Naruto. I said I wasn’t.

So, I snuck out again. This time I was ready.

Two months in. I had suffered the darkness of the closet, getting hit with a switch, starvation, them taking my sister away from me, kicks, fights, pulling hair, and all sorts of abuse. I was done. I wasn’t going to let this continue. Just to separate a little girl from taking care of a child. Who was innocent! Who was a jailer for a demon! Who saved their lives every day he lived! I was fucking done.

I sat and waited. I made sure Naruto and Hana wherein the back of the room. Covers up sleeping soundly and comfortably. They had four other cribs placed between them and the door the block anyone trying to get to them easily.

I stood in front of them with a splintered piece of wood from one of the cribs and my scalpel from the hospital I had been saving.

Morning came. Shion opened the door and immediately tensed.

“You-!” She said angrily. “We locked you in the closet last night! How are you out!”

I stood up waving my makeshift bat and scalpel where she could see them. She backed up. “I picked the lock,” I replied growling at her in my accented speech.

“Where did you learn to do that!” She growled trying to make a grab at me I dodged her and whacked her in the side. “Oh, you little brat!”

“All those nights you locked me up! I kept trying to get out! Now you’re going to Liston to me! Leave Naruto, Hana and I alone!” I growled at her whacking at her other side this time. She tried to grab me again, but I dove under her arms and she missed.

“You heathen, when I get my hands on you!” She ran after me. “Why would I leave you three alone with that demon. He’s the reason half our village is gone. He killed our Hokage!” She yelled.

I jumped over some pillows I placed on the floor and made a swipe at her with my bat. “Wrong! He did not! He’s just a baby! Babies can’t hurt anyone!” I yelled back.

“Oh, you’re a naive little girl, you don’t know anything. If the Hokage didn’t make that law I would tell you what he really did! Now stop this foolishness before I show you how much worse you’ll get than the closet!” She jumped after me but missed and slipped over the pillows.

I took my chance and ran back over to her and whacked her right over the head. She screamed and tried to cover herself, but it was too late. Her head hit the back of the floor and then I pounced before she could recover.

I placed my scalpel against her jugular and glared into her eyes. It took her a few seconds before she regained her senses. She had a trail of blood that fell down from her forehead. She blinked up at me as my eyes glared at her angrily back.

“You're wrong,” I growled. “He’s not a demon. He’s not a monster and if you move, I’ll kill you.” I said digging my scalpel into her throat.

I was shaking I know she could feel I was. But so was she. She stared up at me in fear. I wasn’t kidding. I was ready to kill her. To save a life. I would do it. This world wasn’t real after all. I could do it. I could. I ignored the tears welling up in my eyes.

“You and the other matrons are going to leave us alone. Or I’ll kill you. I know something about Naruto that you guys don’t. I know everything. But I know something more. Do you want to know what it is?” I said to her leaning in closer almost a whisper my hair curtained over both of us in a blond halo. I was almost vibrating now, scared out of my mind as I was. I could feel a trail of blood from her slick my hands.

Holy shit I could feel her blood on me.

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.

I can do this. I can do this.

She was scared. She must be. A child was going grudge on her like some Chuckey Harley Quinn. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. I was going to do this. I was really going to do this. Heaven help me.

“Whose child do you think Naruto is. He’s not some no named orphan. He’s a hero. That’s what the Fourth Hokage wanted. You know him, right? You know what the fourth Hokage looked like right? Well! Take a look! Take a look!” I yelled and shoved her head to look towards Naruto. Like clockwork, I watched as recognition slowly morphed across Shion’s face. She suddenly looked so sick.

“N-no…You're wrong. He-He can’t…” She said tears falling from her eyes.

“He is. And you’re sick. Abuser.” I growled to her my blue eyes glaring down at her. She turned back at me her brown eyes staring into my face as if she was seeing me for the first time.

“Y-You! You too!” She pushed herself away from me making me fall onto the floor.

I growled and got back up. “You tell no one!” I yell at her pointing my scalpel at her. She backed herself away from me standing herself up against the wall shaking.

“Y-Yes. Of course, I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. I won’t speak of it. I’m sorry.” She replied holding her hand against her neck.

I stared at her then reinforced my glare. “I’ll kill you if you tell anyone,” I told her.

“I understand. I promise I won’t speak a word. I’ll leave you three alone from now on. I’ll tell the other matrons to not bother you three. I’m so sorry, you- Aiya-san. I’m so sorry.” She sobbed before running from the room.

What the fuck. I thought. Oh god. Fuck. I thought it’d be harder. Fuck. I thought I have to like to carve into her bones not to tell anyone. Fuck…

I stared down at the carpet drops of blood staining the once white fabric. My hand dripped the dark liquid.

I looked down at it.

Oh. God.

I rushed over to the bin by the wall and puked. I stabbed someone. I stabbed someone. All for a promise. For a promise.

I stabbed someone.

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.

I can’t do this.

I can’t breathe.

I puked into the bin till my stomach was empty and then dry heaved some more. Fuck. Fucking hell. I cried. Tears and snot running down my face.

I can’t do this. I’m going to die here. In this world. I want to go home.

A baby's cry sounded behind me. I turned around as I wiped a hand over my mouth and face to get the excess gunk off of it.

“Hold on. I’m coming.” I told them. I didn’t know who it was. Naruto or Hana didn’t matter. Both were mine now. I fought for them. I fought for them and I’ll protect them.

With everything I have.

* * *

 

 

The tensive piece afterward was terrifying. The Matron’s avoided me like the plague. Saiua was the only one not completely terrified to come near the kids and me. That was only to drop off food and to leave quickly.

I had no fucking idea what Shion told them. But I guess it was better than the closet. Anything was better than the closet. It took a week for my wounds from the switches to heal. I was able to get another baby bag for Naruto from the monthly supply drop off the village give the orphanage. I felt suffocated though.

I needed air. So, I found two slings big enough to fit Naruto and Hana. And a baby hat for Naruto’s hair and left the orphanage in the day time.

I’m sure Shion and Suki gave a sigh of relief at that.

The village seemed to be rebuilt a lot from the last time I’ve seen it. 

I walked all over the village, learning the best way to the academy, library, training grounds, and the hospital. I often got lost the first month in Konoha, but after getting rude directions from some people I was able to get back to the orphanage easy enough.

During my adventures outside, I had taught myself to read as little as I could, every chance I got I would try to understand the kanji in the books at the library. They had a child's learning section that I ventured to more frequently with every pacing day.

Learning kanji, was horrifying. It had so many different meanings that a single stroke could turn the word into something completely different. Words for the sky, moon, grass, tree, came easy with the pictures but saying they were hard, my mouth would feel conflicted, the foreign words sounding strange coming from my voice.

More than once I wanted to chuck the books and say to hell with it. But I wasn't learning this for myself, I had to work, for Naruto, and Hana, we all needed to grow up strong in all aspects.

I soon had a favorite "The Tales of the Gutsy Ninja" that I would read constantly to my sister and Naruto. The book reminded me of the person Naruto was to become. Who he was named after.

I worked on reading and talking mostly, once I was finished with all the books in the library for my age, I moved to scrolls. All sorts of scrolls, about chakra, ninjutsu, taijutsu, genjutsu, anything I could get my hands on.

I soaked up learning, not only my mind grew but my body too. At night when everyone was asleep, I worked on building up my strength, doing push-ups, crunches, squats, stretching till my body was so wiped out I would fall asleep right where I started, then wake up and do them again.

Working myself to the bone wasn't healthy but neither was waking up with your little sister in the Naruto universe. If I didn't work, I was going to definitely go to be squashed by all the other ninja. 60% of civilians died in full out ninja battles, and with the coming wars, I wasn't going to be the 1% added to it.

In between taking care of Naru & Hana, I now thought of them as a unit, learning kanji, exercising till I dropped, I was practicing my chakra. I had to unlock it first. That was a trial. It took me two weeks of meditation before I even felt anything that I was sure wasn’t supposed to be there. The blue energy was weird. It felt like an adrenaline rush one minute and a lazy river the next. Learning to push and pull it just left me feeling more drained then I felt from even doing my normal workouts. It also did the weirdest thing. It kept bouncing off other things. Like showing me other colors. I could see the blue which was mine. With Hana next to me she was red and green and so sleepy I almost wanted to join her sometimes.

 My chakra bounced off hers all the time. With Naruto it was different. His was Gold and Yellow and Red. The gold and yellow were bright and bubbly. It was good and happy, made me want to hug and curl up next to it on a bright summer’s day. But red. The simmering red was like a furnace. Waiting to swallow you if you got to close. It could become a raging inferno if it wanted. It was just biding its time. When my chakra bounced off it. It bounced back. And that terrified me.

I could see other people’s chakra this way too. It wasn’t close. I range wasn’t far. I could only bounce off so many people. Only tell so many people’s emotions. But it helped when I was walking by some villages and I knew if they were aiming ill intent towards Naruto or not and who to avoid.

I also started on other things for my Chakra.

I couldn't straighten out start walking on walls, probably wouldn't get very far anyway, without anyone noticing, so I tried to work on sticking things to myself. My clothes, my shoes, Naru & Hana even. I worked on the pushing and pulling of the water in my mouth when brushing my teeth. Getting the toothpaste to do all the work of cleaning them for me than having to use a toothbrush.

My coils weren't completely formed yet, so even little things tired me out when I did use it. It didn't get me to stop but I did tone it down sometimes. Taking my time with each exercise I used with chakra, letting myself get used to the feel of manipulating it.

The day it marked six months of being in the orphanage I had woken early once again. Hana was being more fussy than usual which in turn made Naruto fussier as well. It took an extra hour for me to feed them both before I was able to get us out of the house.

Ignoring the playing children outside I passed them and headed to what would become team sevens training ground number three. Naruto didn't want to be put in the sling today, so I was carrying him to a tree I had dubbed our usual spot.

I usually put a blanket I nipped from the orphanage down to lay on there and let Naru & Hana play on it while I re-read "The tales of a Gutsy Ninja".

Today was an especially hot day, the sun giving me rise to roll up my sleeves and wipe at the sweat on my brow. I made sure my infants staid in the shade before I relaxed against the tree.

I was reading allowed again to them. Trying not to stumble over my words when A silver blur landed in from of us.

I picked up Naruto and shielded Hana surprised; it was a silver-haired wolf masked ninja in the standard uniforms.

I narrowed my eyes at him. What the hell did he want?

"Are you Aiya from the orphanage?" He asked.

"What do you want?" I glared at him holding Naruto tighter if he came to take him away, I wasn't going to sit down and let him. Like fucking hell was he separating us.

The man's shoulders twitched, amusement seeping through his voice.“I mean no harm, Hokage-sama is looking for you."

"Why?" 

"He wants to speak with you." He replied.

My eyes widened; it had been six months since the man had just left us in the orphanage. Why the fuck did he want to check on us now? After everything that’s happened. Now?

Did Shion finally tell the Hokage what I knew about Naruto? Was I finally sold out? Was about to lose my family again?

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.

I knew I should have finished her when I had the chance. Weak stomach damned.

Calm down. It could be nothing. He could just want to see Naruto. It’s nothing. Fuck. Calm down. Just breathe.

You can do this.

Fuck.

"Okay," I swallowed, my mouth was far too dry all of a sudden, “I’ll go."

The man nodded, as I gathered my things and replaced my infants in their sling. They didn't put up a fuss feeling the heaviness in the air surrounding me.

The man picked us up when I was done, sidestepping us to the Hokage's tower. The building was much bigger than I imagined, dominating a majority of the surrounding buildings. It was suffocating walking through it, ninja stopped and stared at us, some having puzzled looks, others recognizing Naruto and glaring.

But the whispers were white wolf ninja, didn't seem to mind them, either he couldn't hear them, which I doubted since I could hear them like they all were talking through megaphones, or he was pretending not to.

I would have sighed in relief when we made it to Hokage's office, but I was about to step from one dog pen to the alpha's pen. Everything could and might get worse from here.

I clutched my siblings sling tight, please don't let this be the last time I see Naruto.

I lifted my chin and straightened my back.

I can do this.

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.

 

* * *

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A: So It took longer to edit chapter 2 and add in the parts I wanted to. Hope you like it. I'm trying to really show the emotions and abuse but I'm not really good at it so I hope it comes across. Hope you readers like it. 
> 
> Thanks for the Kudos.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which there is great.
> 
> There is love.
> 
> There is time missed.
> 
> And there is time revealed.
> 
> What have I not seen all this time?

_“Cold bones. Yeah, that's my love. She hides away, like a ghost.Does she know that we bleed the same?Don't wanna cry but I break that way. Cold sheets. Oh, where's my love?I am searching high; I'm searching low in the night.Does she know that we bleed the same?Don't wanna cry but I break that way.Did she run away?Did she run away? I don't know. If she ran away. If she ran away, come back home. Just come home”- SYML_

* * *

 

 

**(Hiruzen's Pov.)**

 

Many people say that life is what you make it. That you can do it if you just work harder. Just be faster. Just push through it. You can do it. Anata. But He couldn’t do it. He watched as his friend. His son in all but name rushed off into the night to fight a demon twice his size and somehow ended up dragging the girl that brought life into his life. Argued with him. Shouted at the top of her lungs that she was going to be Hokage. Was so strong and good and beautiful you think the whole world would tremble at her feet. The whole world almost did. She was a one-woman army on the battlefield herself. Her husband. His son. Was one as well. He was a master seals-man. A creator of a jutsu that made him faster than almost light itself. Losing Both of them to that beast. It was devastating.

And his Biwako. His beautiful. Kind. Wife. The one who promised to come back to him. To ground him. Hit him over the head when he was being stupid. Drag his ass out of bed every morning to do that god forsaking paperwork. The one who brought a smile to his face every morning kissed his face, gave him a beautiful son, love him so unconditionally that he was sure he was going to hell because how could he deserve such a woman. She brought out all the right and wrong things in him. Then took those things and made a sound like something so pure it was a wonder how he ever lived without her in his life. And now she too was gone. He found her lying on the floor expecting to be crushed or with a claw-like slash through her stomach much like his honorary daughters. But no. Someone killed her. And Niwaki. The other midwife. Biwako’s best friend. The woman who came over and practically raised Asuma as well as a second mother. The woman who baked cookies and never had a hair out of place. Yelled at everything, always found his porn stash and hassle him about it. She was just always there. A fixture in their lives. Biwako and Niwaki. My wife and Sister. Kunai to the throat. Someone killed them. Both from behind. While they were focused on Kushina’s birth.

No, the beast didn’t release by accident. Someone forced it. And He wanted to know how. He craved to know how. He craved like ravage animal starved of hunger. He wanted to hurt. To scour the entire village. Drag every god damn person no matter who they were and interrogate them within an inch of their life. He already knew. He was a fool to forget some people wouldn’t let go of power easily. He can burn the snake’s tail, but the head was still moving. Someone got into his village. Or was already in his village and they did that. They released that beast. That demon.

The most horrendous thing of all was watching his honorary son and daughter give their lives to bind the monster into their own child. A babe not even hours old. A babe who already looked so much like his father, he knew if his identity ever got out that his life was forfeit.

The number of fucks he screamed that night, cried, grieved and just gave into the numbness because the village needed him when frankly they all could just go to hell, were excruciating.  

He was way to fucking old for this. To lose ever again. Fuck this life. Was this his curse. To live longer than everyone he loved. Tobirama-Sensei, I’m sorry your wish couldn’t come true. He thought.

It was impossible to believe anyway.

After what came to be known as the Kōhai overnight the village had come together. He knew who the culprit was. He had hoped and prayed that his old friend would have enough honor left to keep the identity of the new jinchūriki a secret from the village. Give the boy a chance at a normal life. Be seen as a boy. A hero. Not a demon. He was just the jailor after all. Not the beast itself. But he was wrong. He had been a fool for many months though. Before Minato even became Hokage. But Minato had been working on his mistakes.

 

After he got rid of Ne, Minato had been looking into Danzo and the other councilmen. There where inconstancies in the village rosters. Missions are given out without the Hokage’s seal. Anbu suddenly killed in action and being replaced almost immediately. The rumors of deceit from the Uchiha clan when Minato knew they were not true, him being close friends with Fukagu and Mikoto. Records of Children from the orphanages listed not matching up with the head counts giving from Minato’s personal guards. Someone was taking them. Taking the children of their village. After Orochimaru Minato wasn’t going to sit back and let something like that happen again. But just as they were closing in on the culprit. The Kohai happened.

 

Sarutobi was no fool. His village was sick. And it was one of the people in his council who was if not fully partly responsible. He had called back Jiraiya to take care of Naruto. To take the child out of the village. He had called back Tsunade as well. Both had come. But something went wrong. Someone got to them first. He didn’t know how. Jiraiya insisted it was safer for him to stay with Tsunade in the village. His spy network too valuable to give up and at a time like this, it was too risky to lock the village down on incoming information.

 

Tsunade had a similar story. Saying Jiraiya would make a better care-taker than her since he already decided to stay and raise Naruto anyway. By that time. Naruto was already in an orphanage. Where the villagers could see him. Knew about him. And Sarutobi was left floundering to pick up the pieces.  


Oh, his trusted Anbu killed the fake Anbu who had taken Naruto and tried to have a Yamanaka invade their left-over memories to see who tried to mess with his family. But there was a seal. On the tongue. And isn’t that new old friend. He knew notifying Jiraiya or Tsunade would tip them off, so he didn’t. For now. They could wait.

 

He posted Anbu he trusted outside the orphanage to watch over Naruto and started plotting.

 

One of the more trivial things he had to do was attend to the left-over orphans from the Kōhai. The Hospital had four rooms of them. It took him four days to get through all of them. He sent the first batch to the east orphanage just a boy and a girl and two newborns. Not that many but it hurt his heart to see those type of eyes on ones so young. The next batch had two boys also sent to the east orphanage along with the two boys in the next one. The last room. Is when he first met her.

 

At the time if he knew he wouldn’t have ever let her go. But he guesses it was blessing in disguise. One of his Anbu informed him the East orphanage was full and could not take any more children. So, it was the south. He really didn’t want to send any children there. That was where Naruto was. Not because he didn’t want them near him, just the less chance one of his old friends’ implants got to him the better.  

 

When he first met Aiya he never really saw her face. Her silk-like blonde hair covered it like a curtain. Much like her name matched. But her blue eyes were piercing as she held a babe of red firey hair in a protective like grip.

 

He wanted to find out her parents’ origins. He wanted to know if she was an implant. She spoke little of the language with the nurse believed was due to the slight head trauma she had suffered from the house one of the Anbu found her under. But she was also young enough to possibly not know enough dictation. When looking at her chart none of her DNA matched any living villager in the database. It was sad. He sighed. She didn’t make much of an impression. Just another young girl was desperate to protect the one last living relative she had. Many siblings who were adopted were often separated. He could understand her distrust. Her glare out of her hair was a fierce one. It reminded him of someone though he couldn’t remember who.

 

He should have realized. He didn’t think. He should have made her move her hair. He was always the fool.

 

Six months into his reluctant second term of Hokage-ship and he could finally breathe again. His regular reports from his Anbu on Naruto stated he was healthy, and he was well taken care of. This brought relief through his bones. He was expecting to receive notice soon of having to replace the care-takers. When so such notice never came, and all his reports stated he was healthy and happy. Sarutobi was relieved. He knew better to just take their word for it though. So, he used his telescope technique to look in on Naruto and imagine his surprise to see him on the back of a very familiar little girl walking around the village.

 

Naruto had a little cap on to hide his hair, as he lay next to another little familiar red-haired babe on the back of the girl. The girl in question had very long hair just like when he first met her, but she had filled out a little. She was taller and had more muscle on her bones that was a little concerning for a child her age.

 

And she had Naruto on her back!

 

Before he decided to have a freakout and send his Anbu out to apprehend her he paused. His Anbu would have reported this. So, he decided to wait and watch. She stopped by the civilian library and picked up some theory books on the Fundamentals of Jutsu and How to use them, not the type of light reading for a girl her age, and the Tales of a Gutsy Ninja, which he snorted at. Of-coarse, she picked that book. Checked them out and continued to a training ground over by the Memorial stone on the North side of the village.

 

She sat a blanket out under a tree, to sit on and sat her back down, pulled out some food and situated herself and the children in a comfortable position to lounge. She then proceeded to read for hours, feeding herself and the babes when needed. Changing them, keeping cool in the shade, playing with them, getting up and going to the river nearby and cooling off even more and then lounging some more while reading aloud to the babes.

 

Naruto and the other child looked to be having the time of their lives. This was a conundrum. He called one of his Anbu towards him with a flick of his hand and ordered them to bring a guard from Naruto’s unit. He needed some information. How long had this been going on?

 

“Tiger, Report,” Sarutobi ordered as mentioned Anbu guard flickered into his office. He pressed on the privacy seal under his desk for extra measure.

 

 

“Hai, Hokage-Sama.” The man replied kneeling down on one knee. “Naruto has had a normal day. He has been well fed and cared for. The caretaker took him out for a picnic, played with him and read him a story. They should still be in training ground three as of right now under Squad Leader Bat’s watch.”

 

Sarutobi hummed. And lifted an eyebrow. Caretaker huh? From what he’d seen in the telescope technique jutsu the so-called caretaker was a little girl no older than three to four years old. He glared at his Anbu and released a bit of killing intent to make the man realize his displeasure.

 

“Is that all?” He asked. “Was there no other information you wanted to tell me before I come to the conclusion that you have intentionally left out something?”

 

Tiger stiffened. His muscles seizing up in trepidation. “H-Hokage-sama,” Tiger said. “My apologies. Naruto isn’t in any danger. What is it that you think I have left out?” The man asked.

 

“How long did you and your squadmates think it would take before I found out about the girl caring for Naruto?” Sarutobi asked amping up his killing intent to make the man sweat. He could feel his other Anbu guard in the room starting to shift in unease. Let them all feel not to displease him. He didn’t like insubordination. And to leave out such a glaring fact out of their reports?

 

Ridiculous.

 

“I-I’m sorry sir…Bat-Taichou ordered not to. Not that, that is an excuse. But you haven’t seen her sir. She looks just like him. Like them. I know it’s impossible but.” He heard the man lick his lips from behind his mask. “The original caretakers were abusive. We were going to notify you. But She kept fighting. For Naruto. Everyday. And Bat-Taichou ordered us to hang back and watch. That girl. She has the will of fire sir. She never gave up. No matter what they did.” He paused as if he was contemplating something. For a long time, he didn't speak.

 

Realizing he was still releasing killing intent Sarutobi let up on it diminishing it almost completely. He saw the sigh of relief from Tiger and could feel the relief from his Anbu hidden from around the room.

 

“They did?” Sarutobi sighed wearily.

 

“They did horrible things, sir. Things a child shouldn’t suffer. We blocked most of it. Kept her from it. But sometimes they still got to her. She took care of Naruto when the matrons of the orphanage left him for hours. Fed him. And played with him. Loved him. It came to a head about four months ago when one of the matrons got into a physical altercation with her. The girl’s smart. Smarter than we gave her credit for sir.” He paused again his masks eye’s looking up into Sarutobi’s own.

 

“Sir, she figured out Naruto was the Yondaime’s son.”

 

Sarutobi’s breath hitched. “She what?” How? How did that waif of a girl figure out a secret, not even the council new?

 

“I don’t think it’s surprising sir. We saw her face for the first time that day clearly. Her hair, sir. It moves just like the late Habanero’s. She looks like the Yondaime as well. She has his face. His eyes. And the Habanero’s hair. We don’t know how. And after taking a closer look at the babe she claimed as her sister the babe looks like a carbon copy of Naruto but with red hair and no whisker marks. Sir. It’s not possible but it’s true and we don’t know how.”

Sarutobi couldn’t breathe. This wasn’t possible. Kushina and Minato couldn’t have other children. He would have known. The seal. It would have taken a team just like it had for Naruto’s birth to hold it down. This wasn’t’ possible.

 

The girl’s file stated she was three to four years old…No. It couldn’t be. Not that mission. It was just after the war. There was no way. He snapped his fingers and Neko flashed to his side.

 

“Get me the file from the Akuma mission.” He ordered heart already pounding in his chest. Neko brought it back in a flutter of leaves and disappeared back to hide behind his bookshelf. He opened the file with shaking hands giving a stern look the Anbu in front of him not to comment until he was done.

 

This mission was one of Kushina’s last before she decided to stay at village only missions. He didn’t know why but now he had an inkling. The mission was pretty straight forward, Jiraiya had requested back up near the borders of Iwa on an undercover operation that needed a heavy hitter to not only be able to infiltrate an Iwagakure compound under heavy guard but be able to take out Akuma Kasugai the General of one of Iwagakure’s Shinobi forces that had refused to stand down during the cease-fire. Jiraiya specially requested Kushina since she was exceptionally beautiful and able to transform her Henge into a full body transformation with the help of the Kyuubi. The mission was slotted to last a year to a year and six months. Five months in Minato joined them for his special work on seals since the compound was locked under a sealing jutsu.

 

Their team stayed on a mission for a full year and seven months. The mission was counted as successful since Akuma Kasugai’s head was delivered to Konoha’s T&I the very day they walked back into the gates of the village and went under their identity checks.

 

But now. A year and seven months. Enough time for a child to be carried and born. For the after a period of the birth to be taken care of. In truth, this mission didn’t need Minato. So why was he requested? Why had Jiraiya requested Kushina for this mission in the first place? Unless Kushina was already pregnant at the time and they needed to get her out of the village.

 

To give birth to a child.

 

Who very much looked like the girl taking care of Naruto at this very moment?

 

Oh, sweet Biwako, Minato. What have you and Kushina been hiding from this village?

 

“Tiger. I don’t think this girl is as impossible as you think.” He said glaring down at the folder in front of him. “Go to the hospital and pick up Anbu Tanuki. Have him bring a DNA kit don’t let anyone see you. Be quick.”

 

“Hai Hokage-sama!”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A: Hay everyone! So, this is definitely different from the original right! So yeah, I have no idea now how I’m going to make the meeting between him and Aiya go. But I am supper pumped. So yeah wish me luck!
> 
> Hope you all enjoyed. I hope I got all my grammar mistakes out but if anyone sees anything just message me okay!


End file.
